


Lions & Llamas (Dan and Phil)

by Conifers



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Death, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Phan, Drabble, Fluff, Humour, M/M, Noodles, Phan Drabble, Phan Fluff, Phanfiction, Sad, Spin the Bottle, fails, otp
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-06-02
Packaged: 2018-05-25 08:50:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6188041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Conifers/pseuds/Conifers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan is supposed to want to kiss his girlfriend, isn't he?<br/>But when it is Dan's turn to spin the bottle, he can't help but wish that someone else is at the receiving end of the bottle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Spinning Bottles

I span the bottle, secretly hoping it wouldn't land on my girlfriend, Louise. She sat to the left of me, her blonde hair covering her face as she rested against my shoulder.  
Phil Lester was sitting next to Louise and there was 4 other people in our circle.   
I sneak a glance at Phil and I just wonder what his kiss would be like. He was such an attractive man and I couldn't help but think of the possibilities. Phil and I. Dan and Phil. Had quite a nice ring to it.  
The spinning bottle came to an achingly slow stop, going right past Louise and finally stopping on Phil.  
Now I'm worried. What if the kiss got the better of me and I couldn't stop?  
I'd have to make an excuse to leave like I'm tired and have to go back to my student dorm room.  
"Ready for this, big boy?" Phil teased and winked.  
I moved into the middle of the circle, bracing myself as Phil moved forward and planted a small kiss on my lips.  
It was different and soft. Cas didn't rush it like Louise did. Louise just wanted the sexier stuff.

"Dan!" Louise hissed and at the same time, Phil quickly pulled away from the kiss before it was deepened. The kiss only lasted for a couple of seconds which was the usual time for a spin the bottle kiss. It had to be a 5 second kiss but to me, the kiss lasted forever and I never wanted it to stop.  
"What baby?" I replied to her.  
"We're taking a walk outside, now, Dan."  
I sighed but got up and followed her.   
"What?" I huffed as we finally reached the cool summers air.  
"You're gay!" She shouted.  
"What the hell?" I was quite speechless. So she had thought the kiss meant more than it did.  
"You're queer for Phil. I bet you fuck him when I'm not around, you faggot."  
"What the hells wrong with you? I didn't cheat on you!" I roared back at this homophobic spork. So what if I was gay, she can't be like that.  
"We're over. I hope you have fun sucking his dick." She started walking away and muttered more things under her breath that I couldn't quite make out.  
"Well I will, thank you!" I shouted to her. I can't believe Louise turned out to be like that. I didn't get all pissy when she was sticking her tongue down Joe's throat.

Once I entered the room again, it was all silent. All the eyes peering at me asked the same question- "what happened?". I bet they're wondering why Louise didn't enter the room with me.  
"We had some differences," I explained, "so she ended it."  
An awkward silence fell and I had to break it again. "Well I'm going to head back to my dorm. Anyone coming back with me?"  
Phil stood up and moved beside me, he lived just down the hall so it's understandable he'd want to come with me... Unless there was another reason why.  
"Okay bye." I shouted into the room and left with Phil.

We walked in silence for most of the way. Trying but failing to make conversation.  
"Well that was some kiss back there." Phil spoke.  
"Tell me about it." I said under my breath.  
"I will," Phil replied, "This beautiful man kissed me and it was like nothing I've experienced before. Sparks were flying all around us and I just melted, Dan."  
I couldn't help myself, I just had to finish what we started. I pushed Phil into the nearest alley way and kissed him.  
"The sequel?" Phil smirked.


	2. Did you put your noodles in the goblet of fire?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil is always forgetting something. Its in his nature to forget things and it's in Dan's nature to make fun of him with rewritten songs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is based on a true story! It is dedicated to my sister who burnt her noodles and didn't get butthurt when I constantly made fun of her with lots of songs and puns. :)
> 
> -Connie

"For lunch, you an have my speciality of medium rare steak, or my delightful lobster with a full seafood salad ORRRRRRR," Phil said in his mocking tone, "the favourite of customers at the moment, Barbeque beef super noodles. What shall it be?"  
Dan chuckled to himself, Phil was trying to make a dreadful situation (as bad as not having any food in the cupboards) seem funny and less painful. Dan had been moaning all morning about the lack of Cheerios and milk. Not so much as a simple tea bag in the cupboards. Nothing. Except, of course, the one packet of super noodles left over from last week.

"Hmm, I think I'll have to go with the super noodles please!" Dan replied, trying (and failing) at sounding happy. A house without food will never be a home.

"Um, Phil? Are you okay? It smells like the depths of hell in here." Sauntering into the kitchen came an unexpecting Dan.  
"Please don't be mad!"  
Dan couldn't help himself, once he had peaked over Phil's shoulder to see what he was crowding around, he couldn't restrain his tongue: "DID YOU PUT YOUR NOODLES IN THE GOBLET OF FIYAH?" Dan practically yelled at Phil in his 'Dumbeldore' voice.

The charred noodles lay in an equally charred bowl. Trust Phil to forget the water in bloody super noodles! They are the easiest thing in the world to make!  
"Well, I guess I just messed up the last morsel of food we had left. I think its time we went shopping."

Asda was relatively empty for once. They could have a quick whizz round the shop and get home in time to soothe their growling stomachs.  
"Phil! Phil!" Dan called, "And you set firrreeeeeee to noodles! Watch them burn as I starve to deaaaaaath!" Dan sang.  
"Adele? Really Dan? I wouldn't quit your day job to write songs."

"These noodles on fireee, fire, fire."  
"Dan. I'm trying to shop here! Stop insulting me with Alicia Keys!"

"Oooooooooohhhhhhh, your noodles on fire!!!"

"Light 'em up up up, light 'em up up up, your noodles on fire!"

Phil decided to ignore Dan's attempt at rewriting Kings of Leon and Fall Out Boy. He had to admit, Dan was making light of the worst thing to happen to the Dan and Phil apartment, the no food crisis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this! Please comment what you think of this! 
> 
> \- Connie :)


	3. Okay, Dan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan always wants everything. Phil can't say no!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a short chapter! 
> 
> \- Connie

"Phil, look at them shoes! They're so nice and... Black. Let's have a look!"  
"Okay, Dan."

"Phil, what about that shirt?"  
"You already own a leather shirt!"  
"But this one has buttons."  
"Okay, Dan."

"Phil, that game is only £10! We can play it on danandphilgames!"  
"Okay, Dan."

"Phil, look at that suit!"  
"When do we ever go out to fancy places?"  
"But I can have this when we do!"  
"Okay, Dan."

"Phil!"  
"Get whatever you want, Dan."  
"This reminded me of you so I bought it for you."  
"A lion shirt? That's so sweet of you, Dan."  
"I love you, Phil."  
"Okay, Dan" Phil chuckled and lightly kissed Dan on his lips.


	4. 27 Outfits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil can't choose what to wear. Just none of the outfits seem to be agreeing with Phil... Or Dan for that matter.

"Dan?" Phil called from his bedroom, "can you help me?"  
Dan padded into Phil's room. He gasped when he saw what a mess it was. Clothes were strewn everywhere. There wasn't a spit in his room which hadn't been invaded by his mountain of clothes.  
"Phil, what the hell?" Dan exclaimed.  
"I don't know what to wear to the party tonight! Can you help me?"  
"Okay, Phil." Dan sighed. He loves helping his little spork but he had other things to do. He rested on Phil's bed whilst Phil modeled some clothes.  
"It's a no from me." The striped shirt just wasn't working with them trousers. Plus, they were getting a little bit too small for Phil now.  
The next piece Phil tried on was too extravagant for a small get together.

"Too casual."

"Too brown."

"Too warm."

"Too mixed. You can't wear spots with checks."

"The colours don't go."

Dan knew he was stressing out Phil but he just couldn't agree on any of the outfits. They just weren't working today.  
"I'm sorry Phil, why don't we just blow off tonight?"  
"I don't know..." Phil replied. He did like parties.  
"Well you've tried on, what, 27 outfits!"  
"Maybe we should just stay in and watch 27 dresses."  
"I'll make the popcorn." Dan was relieved he didn't have to go but he didn't let Phil know this. He just wasn't up for it. A quiet night in with popcorn and 27 dresses seemed just perfect for them.


	5. Sing Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil would usually dislike Dan's type of music with a passion but when he starts to get to know Dan better, he can't help but find himself belting out a lyric or two of My Chemical Romance in the shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I found this prompt about soulmates singing at the same time like they do in musicals on tumblr which inspired me to write this. I can't remember who made the prompt but thank you!
> 
> I hope you enjoy!
> 
> \- Conifers

Phil was just having his usual, week day 9 am shower. He's always loved singing in the shower but this time the lyrics just jumped out of his mouth. They were unexpected lyrics. Phil wasn't thinking of singing, just concentrating on soaping up. He was completely surprised. He didn't even know that he knew these lyrics. He knew the song, of course. It was Welcome To The Black Parade by My Chemical Romance. Phil wasn't particularly a huge fan of them, in all honesty.

Once he had climbed out of the shower, he padded into Dan's room. "I've been singing your songs again!" he loudly whined, grabbing Dan's attention so he looked up from his laptop.  
"What song?" Dan asked.  
"Black Parade."  
"That's funny. I was just singing that song myself!"

"You're starting to rub off on me, Howell." Dan left the room, quietly humming the tune to a different song- Centuries by Fall Out Boy. To Phil's surprise, Dan also starting humming the exact same tune at the exact same time. Phil did a complete 180 degree turn so he was heading back to Dan's room again.  
"How did you know I was going to sing that?" Phil was startled. How had Dan known? Was he a mind reader or something?  
"I didn't. That tune just kinda slipped out of my mouth. I wasn't even thinking it."  
Phil started singing again, but this time he deliberately chose a song that he knew Dan would never have heard before. Twist and Shout by the Beatles. Dan wasn't into that sort of music but sure enough, when Phil started singing his little tune, the lyrics were rolling of Dan's tongue effortlessly.  
"Come on Dan! How did you do that? Are you a psychic?"

Obviously, Dan was not a psychic and neither was Phil but they had a unmistakable connection. No matter how far apart they were or what song it was, they would sing whatever the other one sang. It was truly something that only belonged in the musicals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked that! Please tell me what you think in the comments!


	6. High Standards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan videos often have fineness but he doesn't think so. Only Phil can help his unsatisfying video.

"PHIL!" Dan moaned loudly, "Help me!" He yelled from his bedroom so Phil would hear him all the way from the kitchen.  
Seconds after Dan had called, Phil came running, thinking it was urgent. But of course it wasn't.  
"Dan! What's up?"  
"My video is awful! I need your expert help!"  
"Dan," Phil huffed, "Your videos are never awful and you say this every bloody video!"  
"But this one is awful, I'm not satisfied with it. Please help." Phil couldn't deny Dan his help once he flashed him the puppy dog eyes, accompanied by his pout.  
He watched the video and sure enough, it was absolutely fine. Phil knew Dan wouldn't accept the compliment of utter perfection. He would never be happy with this video unless something was changed.  
"How about you add some effects here..." Phil pointed at the screen in front of him, "And here." He pointed once he had fast forwarded through the video. Some simple animation wouldn't impact the video much. Phil was skeptical that Dan would even accept this criticism, it was so insignificant.  
Phil waited with bated breath before Dan gave him the go head- a nod with a thumb in the air- to continue adding effortless effects. He only added a small explosion into one corner of the still and then a sparkle into Dan's hand when he waved them about, pretending to be brewing up some fairy spells.  
"That's so much better now, it really added to the video! Thank you so much!"  
Phil was pleased with helping Dan but he really could be picky sometimes.  
"I didn't even do much! It was perfect to begin with!"  
"What can I say? I have high standards." Phil kissed the top of Dan's head lightly and sauntered out of the room, gently whistling to the theme tune of Great Expectations.


	7. Stress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exam stress. Everyone struggles with it during the exam period.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been so long! Exams have been hard!

Exams. The one word that sends a shiver of stress down the youth's spines.  
Phil was hit with a wave of worry on the night before his GCSE's, Inevitably. Dan always thought Phil was the sort of person to have a full on break down before exams but would totally ace them. So when Dan's phone rang at 2 am on exam day, Dan was not surprised to see Phil flash up.  
"Dan," Phil's voice flooded through the phone, "I can't do this. I don't want to do biology tomorrow." Dan sighed. He was thinking of his response to make Phil better.  
"Phil," He started, shuffling his body so the phone was resting comfortably on his shoulder with his head pushed up against it, "Everyone is struggling with exam stress but I can promise you, you have done all the revision a human could possibly do and you are going to completely smash this exam. I just know you will because I know you. All the stuff in the exam, you will know. The exam boards learnt their lesson last year when they published that biology paper with zero biology so don't worry, they won't do that again. And if they do, you will do amazing on the business questions in it... perhaps not the drunk rat question but hey, last year they had low grade boundaries. Okay?"  
Dan listened intently to the commotion happening on the other side of the phone.  
It was Phil getting into bed.  
"I'm tired. I will do rubbish on this exam staying up until 2. What was I thinking?" Phil asked.  
"You weren't, it was the stress thinking. I suggest that you go get yourself a nice cup of tea, decaffeinated, and settle down into bed. You're going to do amazing tomorrow, Phil. I know you don't believe me but you will. I have faith in you. You'll do us all proud no matter what."  
"Thank you. I believe in you too. Sorry for ringing you so late. Goodnight, sleep well. See you tomorrow in the exam." Phil finished and hung up, not waiting for a reply from Dan.


End file.
